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I know this Christmas will be different for me. It’s the first Christmas since my husband of 22 years walked out on me.
So what’s my holiday attitude? Meh. There, I said it.
There will be no tree, no wreaths, no lights strung outside of my house. I’m taking a pass this year. That’s not to say that I’m not enjoying everyone else’s trees, wreaths, and lights. But for me, putting them up this year would feel forced. But it’s okay. Sometimes we have to step out of the picture to be able to see it more clearly.
This attitude will pass. All the outward displays of merriment will be back next year when I can look at this time in my life as a bump in the road. A lesson learned.
Though the season has left me a bit deflated like those blow-up Santas you see on lawns in the daytime, I remain hopeful and thankful.
I’m hopeful that my future will be filled with great new adventures. And thankful for family and friends who remind me that I’m loved, even when I’m ugly crying. And who also remind me that I’m stronger than I think I am.
So I guess I do have an attitude—an attitude of gratitude. But I’m still not putting up a Christmas tree. You can’t make me.
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